the curtains flew, then he appeared

[confidenceman]

The metal of the gun which he gripped in his hands was cool, though it wouldn't remain that way for long. Firearms were a necessary evil. If a man was lucky, he wouldn't ever have to pull the trigger on anyone, would live a full life without knowing how gunpowder smelled or the way that a gun came to life after a shot fired, surface hot to the touch. It wasn't the type of weapon that one could use with their eyes closed, too much kick back, like it was telling the user to remember very well what he or she was doing right then. But he didn't need that reminder. No, even as his mind reeled in circles and his breath held the heavy scent of whiskey on the tip of his tongue, he knew the weight of the gun in his hand, felt his feet drag as he slowly carried himself up that staircase.

Maybe his mind was playing tricks on him, but he could have sworn that he heard her speaking in hushed tones to someone. With that, he thought ruefully, it was like she was sealing her own death sentence. Not that he minded when she talked to other people. He wasn't that kind of possessive, fingers weaving through endless curls of hair, no. But he was a man, and she was his wife, and so there were certain things that any decent wife wasn't supposed to do. Maybe he could have forgiven her for transgressions, admitted that he could have been a better husband, better father, and a better man, but she had signed away all that they had to their name.

There was nothing left to build from.

Comments

[confidenceman]

He whirled around, hair whipping through the air and a look of desperation in his eye. She was... there was just something about her, Sawyer kept on thinking to himself. Not that she was bad company, not that he even minded having her around— which was saying a lot, because at the end of the day, Sawyer was almost always most comfortable curled up on his own with a decent book in his hands— but she seemed interested in him somehow, and he couldn't figure out why. Just because he was a con man?

He didn't want to be interesting to anyone for that simple reason alone, not anymore.

"If you're so worried about me gettin' lost, come the hell along," he bit out, not angry so much as frustrated, and underneath it all, hurt. Self-loathing. Nothing out of the ordinary. "But don't act like that didn't just... happen."

[devilwoman]

"I'm not acting like it didn't happen. I just don't much like the idea of being alone right now," Saffron admitted as she moved to catch up with Sawyer. "That's the second time I've had to deal with Reavers today. I reckon getting shot this time was just an added bonus." She lifted a hand to her arm reflexively, even though there was no trace of an injury there now.

"I'm not acting like it didn't happen, Sawyer," she repeated, and she sounded tired. "I just didn't think you'd want to get into it. But hell, if you want to explain to me what I just saw, I'm all ears."

[confidenceman]

"I don't want to," Sawyer replied first, figuring that it was best to be honest with that much, now that subtly dodging the matter was no longer exactly an option. She'd seen more than she should have. That was all. He tried telling himself that over and over as he straightened up, slowly ambling with Helen by his side. "No more'n I'm sure you want to explain the Reavers and whatever they did in your life. I know how to put my experiences aside, much as I'm sorry for having shot you in there."

His jaw was grit as he looked forward, rubbing at the stubble on his face. "Do I drop you off at your hut? You got people around there?"

[devilwoman]

"I'll tell you all about the gorram Reavers, if you want. They're everyone's worst nightmare where I come from, least everyone who knows they're not a myth," replied Saffron, her accent coming out a little more in her agitation. "I could even tell you about how they were here three Halloweens ago - and that wasn't no nightmare, that was real." She brushed a hand over the arm Sawyer hadn't shot, where the faint scar was, one of two she carried from that day.

She took a slow breath as they walked along, and while she didn't want to be alone it seemed clear Sawyer didn't have the same line of thinking. It didn't seem like him dropping her off at her hut was going to end in anything but her being alone, and normally her lack of nearby neighbors was a good thing...just not right now.

"No, I reckon I'll go back to the party," she replied. "It's like to still be going, and I'm sure there'll be folks I know there." The one she really wanted to see was Xander, but he hadn't been at the party earlier, and she didn't want to bug him at home, not tonight.

[confidenceman]

He never apologized for his tendency to wander off all his own. Never apologized, because Sawyer could never understand why it was that made people think that they owed each other something like that. Companionship. Maybe in an ideal world, the mere presence of a warm body next to oneself would always be comforting. But Sawyer had always felt safest on his own, or at least had since his parents passed away; when one's own hearth and home was sprayed over with blood, where else could one turn to be safe? It had to be while on the run. Avoiding surveillance.

"Party sounds like a good idea," Sawyer murmured softly, distracted, although a large part of him realized that there was no way he could be expected to attend the party and find any similar amount of comfort in it. They wanted the opposite of one another right then, and maybe that was fine. The world needed people of all types. "I'll drop you there, keep the Reavers from gettin' back again. 'Least they're a nightmare you can share, I guess."

[devilwoman]

It felt suddenly like she'd come to a turning point, though to and from what, she didn't know. She just knew what was strongest in her mind right then, and it seemed like a revelation, one that had been building a long damn time. She and Sawyer were about to part ways, and she was...all right with that.

"I'd appreciate it," Saffron said, "and you know where to find me if you change your mind about talking." She didn't think he would, but she threw the offer out all the same, so he'd know it was there.

[confidenceman]

"I—"

He just felt broken. Maybe what he needed more than anything else was someone to sit him down and force him to deal. Not to let him fall back to bad habits that were resurfacing more than they had in months now, the impulses that told him to run and not look back. His jaw grew taut, refusing to let him speak, taking a deep breath.

"Yeah, yeah I know where to find you," he said quietly with a careful nod, walking the both of them toward the Compound, wishing that he had a positive way of venting his frustrations.